Easter weekend

The kids have a couple days off here, which is lovely. They could all use the rest right now to be honest. They are all pretty tired.

It is snowing today so they are indoors and Wes is also working on the house - mudding etc. So I am trying to keep them downstairs. There is to be honest quite a bit of fighting and send to rooms etc. We've lost an ipod, OH HEAVENS WHAT SHALL WE EVER DO!!!

I'm thinking that today is one of those days we just have to live through. As my Grandma used to say, This too will pass. And so it shall, hopefully with minimal casualties.

Last weekend was not warm, but it wasn't snowing, so the kids were on their bikes. Bronwyn picked up from last summer and is doing great. Mari is also on a regular bike now. After a few pushes up the street by Dad she is riding on her own. She just struggles with getting started, figuring out how to push and get on the go. It will come. We are pretty impressed with how she is doing!

I'm hoping we can get the walls primed soon, so the lengthy process of mudding and sanding can be over! Its getting close... so close... and yet so far...

Spring break

We made it through spring break. It wasn't really "spring" break this year. Well, honestly it never is!

Gavin had a lacrosse camp most of the week, which he really enjoyed and he also took a couple ski lessons, which he loved. I'm so pleased that he is enjoying a couple sports, just don't know why he had to pick such an expensive one (skiing), maybe he could take up yachting next?? The girls do activities all winter, but Gavin has had nothing on this year. So he crammed everything into one week! Ha!

Wes and Gavin also took a snowboard lesson. I asked Gavin how Wes did and he said, "Well," big sigh, "he fell a LOT." I'm just so proud of Wes! So proud that he is willing to try new things and spend time with his boy!

The girls had a more relaxed week, we still did lots of fun stuff, just more casual fun stuff.

We were all a bit bummed to be back at school, but they love it and the routine is good for them. And, I finally got my laundry folded. It is amazing how my time gets sucked away when they are home. But, they are pretty good company!

Mari and I are off to Ikea with a friend. I'd say a friend of mine, but Mari loves her to bits, so she would take exception to that!!

Oh and I finally downloaded pictures and found some! Wow! I guess I do take pictures, I just forget.

 

Last of the deep thoughts

Does anyone else miss Jack Handey's Deep Thoughts. Sigh. They were awesome!

I promise my next post will be of children playing and being cute as buttons, but I haven't been taking pictures and the kids haven't been doing anything terribly cute, thanks to the super cold weather - that is unless you consider playing on their various tablets cute! Which I don't! But warmer weather is coming and so is the cuteness - I can just feel it.

Recently I saw on Facebook an initiative to encourage "random acts of kindness." I love this! Love it! The world can always use more random kindness - this is exciting.

But...

This got my mind whirling. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could start a campaign for "Consistent Consideration." Where we could bring consistent change to our daily lives in how we see others and our concern for their well being.

Take for an example a soar spot for most of us - driving.

Imagine how things would change is we (and I am including myself in this):

- left room between our car and the one in front of us, not only to have the room, but to allow for others to merge into the lane we are in. Positioning our car in a considerate way.

- or upon seeing someone signal that they want to enter the lane we are in, we slowed down and let them in rather than speeding up to get ahead of them.

- or really believed that people merging onto Deerfoot also have the right away as the sign says, and not treating a merge sign as a yield.

In short, what if we treated other drivers with a courteousness that they may or may not deserve. Because as in most things how we treat someone says less about them than it does about us.

If even a few drivers did this it would make life so much more bearable, as I discovered this morning when a driver allowed me to turn on to a very busy road and even smiled at me!

Will this prevent accidents and incidents - no. People are human and make mistakes, machines malfunction. But, wouldn't it be an encouragement.

This is just one example, imagine if everyone in the office put their own dishes in the dishwasher and didn't expect the receptionist to clean up after them. There are a million little things we can do.

I have to confess I am often thoughtless and self absorbed. But I have also discovered that making changes to other people and my surroundings can be quite difficult. Perhaps I could focus on changing myself and my own attitudes, what will be the outcome?

So here is my suggestion. For today lets try to see the world through the eyes of others and try to make the world better for them. It may do nothing to change the world, but I bet it will change us!

What do you think?

The modern mom

There is so much pressure in our world, our society to be a great Mom. Now while I think my mom was a great mom, I know she didn't spend a lot of time obsessing about how she was doing it or if she was making better choices than other moms. Maybe its the internet, blogs, pinterest or facebook, or maybe its older moms looking to find the same markers and job satisfaction they had before entering the world of snotty toddlers.

I'm not sure what is causing it, but it is undeniably - out there. I read blogs that refer to the "judgy-ness" of other Moms (Yes I did just make up that word - its my blog!). The stay at home Mom writes about the virtues of her role and defends her choices, rightfully so. The working Mom writes about the complexities and struggles of balancing all of her responsibilities, and rightfully so.

Being a mom, no matter how you do it is hard. But I think maybe we are making it harder. We parent like we are living in a mirror, watching our own movements, playing back the tape, reviewing our errors and vowing to make changes. Momming (yes I made up another word), has become "competitive," like Olympic figure skating, or bobsleigh.

In the face of that atmosphere, I have a confession. They say confession is good for the soul right? Well, by any standard set by any group or camp, I fail. I suck. You just need to come visit my house, after stepping on a few dozen fish crackers and cheerios (and no my kids aren't toddlers any more so there is no excuse for me), you will see that I am not a good house keeper. I'm not even a sort of good house keeper. Now in my defense, my house has and likely always will be in various states of renovation. A joy to try to work around I assure you. But, not even being to hard on myself, I quite happily admit that I do not like house work and I only do it when forced, or when the family members start making comments.

So, I must be good at something, at least you work right? No don't do that either. OK I try, and try is the operative word to do my husbands book keeping. I'm not a book keeper and frankly I suck at that too - just ask our tax accountant! Don't she might be too candid.

I occasionally pick up a few jobs here and there with the company I used to work with, but I fear I've lost my edge, I don't have the same "clued-in-ness" (yeah I know - I'm on a role) that I used to have.

It would seem the only thing I am still good at is making up words! I'm good at that you have to concur.

Having said all this, I don't mind one bit. I rather like being in this no-man's land of the mom world. You have no idea the respect I have for my working mom friends. How they manage it is beyond me. I know men mean well, but the decisions about the kids and the house and the cleaning and the laundry and the childcare, usually (not to lump all men together), usually fall at the feet of the mom, whether she works or not. So to you moms that work and make the worlds still turn for your families, kudos! You are my hero.

For the mom who stays at home and may even (horror of my personal horrors) home school their children. I don't know how you do it. To bring such meaning and earnestness to your work at home, to your children and their successes. You too are my hero!

Lets just remember that being a mom is just part of who we are. We are whole people and lets not judge ourselves solely on our success or failure in one area of our lives. Even if it is super important (I get that - don't worry).

Because, it is important, even for the more mediocre of mothers to have heroes! So press on and stop being so stinking critical of yourselves. No one else sees your mistakes and if they did, they should sympathize not judge. If you feel judged, sit down and ask yourself, am I actually being judged or am I doing this to myself. If you are being judged, brush it off (easily said I know). You are permitted mistakes, you are allowed to be imperfect.

If you are reading this and you feel judged - DONT! I love the many and wonderful ways we express ourselves as Moms. So go out today and express yourself as who you are and remember you are "fearfully and wonderfully made."

The problem with platitudes

Our world is full of them, platitudes. Sayings that typify or answer a great question. You've seen them - if you've ever been on Facebook. Usually written on some lovely picture, for added inspirational value.

Here are a few I have heard over the years:
 - God never gives you more than you can handle.
 - What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
 - Whenever one door closes another will open.

Here is a story about a platitude that I have more respect for than the above mentioned. "This too will pass." Let me talk about the last one, as an example of my issue with platitudes. When I was in University and I would be all bent out of shape about something, my Grandma used to say. "This too will pass." And I'd grind my teeth and huff under my breath. Because at the time I didn't understand. I was young and I had no idea that there would be a time in my life when I could care less what I got for a grade in eighteenth century restoration fiction.

Now! Now... I get it.. well, at least I understand more than I did at the time.

Some times we say things to help encourage others. We mean well, really we do. We often don't know what to say and we sure as heck don't know how to fix the problem so we start looking for silver linings, ways to encourage. And this my friends is beautiful in itself, the motivation is always good.

The problem is that sometimes these things can ring empty. But we still need to say them, because we care and we are helpless to do anything else.

I have had several conversations lately where I have been at a loss for words. Friends whose lives have taken such complicated turns that I wouldn't know where to start. So I default to platitudes. Ughhh!!! What the hell is wrong with me!

Perhaps the platitudes are better really because without them my usual repertoire includes things like:
 - Wow that sucks!
 - Go big or go home!

See, as I have said before, sympathy and understanding are not my strong suites.

The problem is that we can't answer the problems of life with a saying or a statement. Our worlds are messy, our worlds are complex. The answers can't be simple and pre-planned.

For me, I am discovering (too bad I'm a slow learner), that I am a better friend when I stop trying to help and just simply listen.

Postscript

So the inevitable and unenviable happened... I got sick Friday night and shortly after I started Bronwyn also began. So we all got it. Unfortunately the timing meant that Bronwyn couldn't go to her dance recital.

The good news is that I was sick enough that it prompted me to feel a bit more sympathetic to my wonderful children and husband who suffered it before me! I vow to be a better wife and mother. I promise!! (wink wink)

Sick week

About a week ago I was thinking about how healthy we have all been this winter, so far. I was surprised that other than the odd snotty nose we'd had a pretty great run. I should have known better...

Friday night Wes came home and announced he had the flu and went to bed. Which meant no furthering of the renovations for me!! See how sympathetic I am.

Sunday Gavin and Mari woke with bad coughs, so we all stayed home for morning, but it just seemed to be a head cold nothing more.

Monday Wes felt well enough to go to work so off he went - to work on other people's homes (not that I'm dwelling on that fact - ahem!). I kept Mari and Gavin home, not that I thought they were that sick, but their coughs sounded bad and I figured people wouldn't appreciate them coughing everywhere. My fear of what people think out weighs my concern for my children's health.

Late Monday night Mari obviously had the flu, and based on the frequent trips to the bathroom, so did Wes. GREAT!

Tuesday I kept Mari home but sent the other two to school as they were fine.

Mari seemed to rally, Wes had a very restful day.

Tuesday night, Mari wasn't over it.

Wednesday kept Mari home, Wes went off to work and I wondered what we were going to eat, since I had not had a chance to get to the grocery store. Not an issue for Mari, she wasn't hungry, but what about me, I asked, yes, what about me? So I found and ate chocolate - yes old Halloween chocolate, by the handful. By the evening Mari has rallied and is playing with her siblings.

Wednesday night Mari throws up again. REALLY!

Oh but wait, now its Gavin's turn. Unlike his little sister who is excellent at making her way to the toilet, Gavin has now puked everywhere in his room. With no warning, no calling for Mom and Dad, just there you are!!

The whole house is now awake as we clean up the mess and the kid and I try to be the sympathetic mom. I do not sleep for the rest of the night. I lay there half resting waiting for any sound that he might start up again. At the first sounds of rustling I run grab the bucket and try to chase his flailing head so we can minimize the clean up. This is fun for me. Sort of a game of catch in the middle of the night.

I call the school in the middle of the night and say that none of the Davis kids are coming. What about Bronwyn you ask? No, she is not sick, but I figure with the interruptions to her sleep she needs the rest. We all finally sleep. Until our lovely neighbor calls to offer the kids a lift to school. Such a kind offer.

Long story and yes, I realize this took as long to read as it did to live through. They are all on the mend now and its a PD day so they are resting and eating home made chicken soup - although I've been told that its a bit yucky and they would prefer Lipton's noodle soup. Thank you offspring! Thank you!

YEAH!

For Elaine & Gerald

Hey there Aunt Elaine and Uncle Gerald,

Click on this grey type - Our Other House Blog.

This is what your nephew has been up to!!

A new year a new page

It is January of 2014. Wow. I was pondering today how that this day 100 years ago the world had not seen the dawn of the new age of war. The world in 1914 was extremely different to what it is now. We are having a terrible winter for snow and yet we still haven't beat the record snow fall, that was in 1912. One hundred years ago life in Calgary would have looked very different. Hmmm. Just caused me pause today. I guess I had a couple minutes to think.

We have been very busy as usual. We spent the last couple weeks at my parents house. Lovely time. They could not have been more gracious. We truly feel so blessed to have them in our lives! The kids were super sad to not see them today.

While we were there Wes was at our house ripping out the kitchen and moving walls around. We are just rejigging our small space to allow for a bedroom for Gavin. We are kind of modern pioneers. We don't add on, we make due with what we have and find creative solutions. I'll post pictures soon, but I'll wait until we have some after shots. I'll try post the plans too - since it is hard to see what we have done from pictures.

The kids are back in school. We have two functioning bathrooms and the current bedrooms are all fine, but we have no kitchen. The good news is that we live very close to lots of places that do take out and our fridge is plugged in. So we are managing fairly nicely. We are living in the basement while and sleeping upstairs.

The only issue is Wes' time is now divided. Now that everyone is back from the Christmas break there is a great demand on his time so... we are hoping to get some of his time so we can get our lives back to normal. But we are managing either way.

I feel that 2014 will be a good year for our family. We have love, we have each other and we have hope for the future. All good things.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
            1 Corinthians 13:13

Annual Christmas card 2013

I am truly sorry for my absence from the blogging world. I have no excuse for myself - just that we have been very busy.

The kids have been doing well and are now happily on their Christmas break. They were getting very tired - so I am hoping they get some rest and maybe bored enough to be happy to go back to school!!

We'd like to wish you all a Merry Christmas from our family. God bless you all in 2014!

Love to you all.

 

The mystery of the tracks in the snow

I was extremely impressed with myself for solving the mystery. So impressed, in fact, that I woke my sleeping husband to tell him. He was slightly less than impressed.

But I'm getting ahead of myself and this story will sound better if I tell it from the beginning, you know the background details.

We have a rather dilapidated fence. It looks rather like a toothless grin with several boards missing. There is a large gate which has been broken since we moved in. We are in a fairly central city location so we try to keep as many vagrants and thieves out (its the rabbits that kill me - seriously - how do I keep them out!). So we have a clever system. A board jammed up against the fence, which is intended to keep the gate from opening. It apparently doesn't work, but perhaps it may slow intruders down?

A couple weekends ago we had fresh snow. The following day I was gazing out my rather dirty kitchen window and saw tracks in the snow. There were lots of rabbit and cat tracks (little lizards!!). But there was one very distinct set of tracks. It came from the back fence, which sat slightly ajar, the board having been dislodged from its duty, right up to the kitchen window and back out the fence again.

I called Wes to see if he had come around the back of the house to grab a tool that may have been sitting by the back kitchen window. It didn't seem likely, since the only thing that is usually in that location is an old barbecue that we haven't got around to discarding yet. But it was worth a try.

Wes had not been in the back yard at all. So we puzzled over it and couldn't figure it out. But it was plain to see we had an intruder.

I tried to dismiss this from my mind but it puzzled me so much. Why would a potential burglar come in the yard and not search around for a point of entry? Like walking up on the deck or going around the side of the house to check basement windows? It was puzzling. Wes had suggested perhaps it was a peeping Tom, but really there isn't much you can see from that spot. You'd have better luck standing across the alley since its sits higher than our fence. So I didn't see the peeping Tom idea either.

But yet there were the tracks...

Several days later, I was laying in bed. Thinking of this and that, unable to sleep. I wasn't thinking about the mystery at all and yet all of a sudden it came to me! I knew who had come into our yard.

I woke Wes up as I turned and exclaimed. "I know who walked in our yard." Wes mumbled something like, "ohyeahh?" I excitedly added, "The ATCO guy." His reader thing must not have been working in the snow so he'd have to come close to read the meter. The meter sits just behind the ancient barbecue that is rusting beneath our kitchen window.

Of course, he just came in looked at the side of the house and left the way he came. Normally their little reader thing works from the alley, but the snow may have interfered. It all made perfect sense to me.

I was extremely proud of my Sherlock Holmes style deductions! All those hours watching mystery shows has finally paid off.

As I said, Wes celebrated  bit less in fact his only reply was a loud snore. Some people don't appreciate the real joys of life.

Late Halloween pictures

I am sorry, for those who have been waiting to see the kids in their costumes - we have been a bit preoccupied lately so I am rather late with these.

Gavin didn't get dressed up ahead of time, like I asked, so I could take a picture of him - oh well. Again, this year they went out with our neighbours, they always have such a blast. This year they really raked in the candy. They stayed out almost two whole hours. Crazy kids!!

Winter is starting to set in and we are hunkering down for the winter.

I hate three o'clock

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and realized that you are the world's worst mother. That you are failing your children sadly and they will regret you for the rest of their lives.

Well, I did last night.

Not sure why, normally I'm quite happy to be an adequate to poor mother, doesn't bug me at all. I figure it will build character in my children. But last night I was just alarmed and vowed to be a better mother today. I would turn over a new leaf, I would be the mother they need.

Good news is - the sun came up... and equilibrium has been restored.

I have spent the morning telling kids to look for their library books later, yelling at them to get their coats on and then neglecting my youngest child while I chatted on the phone with a friend and then frittered away time on the computer.

Whew! Close call. But no worries I'm back to my high level of complacency that gets me through my life.

Perhaps, I should feed the third child...

Or tackle folding all the laundry...

or take a nap?

We are back home

Our whirlwind visit to southern Saskatchewan is over and we are home and looking forward to a relaxing weekend. Well, tomorrow is looking pretty brutal, so maybe a relaxing Sunday.

We did a lot during our quick visit. Visited family, had some fun and I even froze my biscuit off in the sub-zero temperatures at the Estevan pool! Yikes!

We have no photos of any one - except the kids. Apparently we can't be trusted. Well, the small camera was dead and we forgot the charger and the big camera is not good indoors, so unless you were outside running around with the kids and Wes there are no pictures of you.

We had a wonderful time and we were hosted so royally by everyone. Thanks to Wes' family as well as mine (that includes you Pippus family) for being so very gracious to us! It was wonderful to see you all and get caught up.

The kids were very sad to return home. They enjoyed their stay so much!

Long Overdue

This post is long over due and so is the road trip we are about to take. The Davis family is off to Estevan to see family. It has been far too long since we have ventured out that way. I thought Wes would be long done his big house project, but alas it is just at the tail end and it has been a real crunch. The break will be great.

The thing I just love about our kids is that they are SOOOO excited. It doesn't matter where we go really, they aren't fussy at all. They just love to go on adventures - even to southern Saskatchewan.

We hope and pray you all have a wonderful and safe thanksgiving. Safe travels if you are on the road.

First days

The kids were back at school today. Gavin has the same teacher as last year and since its a 3/4 split the best ever thing happened. His best buddy and neighbor is in his class this year! (Because of the cut off they are not in the same grade). Wow! What excitement that caused.

Bronwyn is now in the English program and is very excited about her new teacher. Apparently he can talk like Scooby Doo! Doesn't get much better than that, does it?

Mari had her first day of Kindergarten. Wow! My baby is in kindergarten. She looked so small going up the steps with her teacher. Big girl that she is!!

They all came home bubbling with excitement about their various days. Great to hear!

Aren't fresh starts lovely!

August happenings

I just realized it has been a couple weeks since I have posted anything.

We had a birthday party for Bronwyn on Thursday. She wanted a swimming party so that is what we did this year. It was a lot of fun and she seemed to enjoy herself.

Gavin has been doing his field lacrosse. Last weekend he had his first field day, this is their opportunity to play in games. He was a bit freaked out by it all and he tended to run away from the play area hoping no one would pass to him! Ha! He's starting to get it though - it will come in time.

Mari has been busy. I asked her if she is excited about school and she said, "Yeah, I go there all the time for Gamo and Bona (how she says Gavin and Bronwyn)." No biggie eh? I don't think that she has grasped the concept yet.

My kids are good!

I have to admit the last week of my life has not been all roses. Not sure why. I think the kids are having mid summer blues and I, well I have been with them 24/7 since the flood shut down the city. So...

On top of that I am not what you might call a "natural" mother. I think I might have been better and more flexible had I birthed my children before getting old and grumpy, but here I am - Old, grumpy and a parent of young children.

The kids have been attending VBS and this year I offered to help, so I have been sticking around. There are 100 kids roughly, give or take a few. I haven't been dealing directly with the kids but still, watching all the manic activity and the running has been exhausting. But it has given me an opportunity to see my kids in action when I'm not the centre of their world. Kind of like spying on them from afar.

When they are with me my kids are happy to give me the gears. They are happy to push me and my patience. They are happy to talk back and be disobedient. But...

With others, they are compliant, good natured, well behaved and good listeners. I am sure they aren't always like that, that they occasionally step out of the lines, but compared to their behaviour at home they are saints!

On one hand this makes me happy. I figure that something of the values we are trying to instill in the kids must be sinking in. But on the other hand, how do I replicate this behaviour at home??

All I can say is I'm proud of my kids - which is saying a lot after the week we just had.

Almost half way

Our summer break is almost half way and I have accomplished nothing. None of the "jobs" I intended to do this summer have been done, and frankly, there is little chance that I'll get to them. So it goes.

The kids start VBS this week. The kids were starting to get a bit antsy and grumpy last week, so I think this a well timed activity.

Just letting you know we are all OK. I'm tired, but we had a nice weekend as a family so I feel revived also. Amazing what a bit of time with a lovely husband can do!

We hope August is as much fun as July. Bronwyn is gearing up for her birthday party, its pretty much all she can talk about. Gavin is enjoying field lacrosse, I think this may be something we continue based on how much fun he is having. Mari is well... Mari is growing like a weed and there are days I still can't believe that my baby is in going into kindergarten! Oh my!

Busy times!

Solidarity

To say we were affected by the flood in Calgary is an understatement.

Now, we weren't "affected" - in other words, we didn't have any damage nor loss. But as part of this community, and I think all Calgarians (and surrounding communities) would agree, we were very impacted. I don't think I know a person who wasn't in some way touched, either personally, or through work, or through friends. It was a massive event that touched so many lives.

Now, I realize the death toll was low and Calgary has been very blessed with a well organized civil service that helped minimize the damages. But still... it is the kind of event that you can't understand until you live through it. Or maybe you can - but I couldn't!

Wes was also deeply affected. Our emotions have been very tied up in the stories, pictures, and conversations with friends. When we saw the "Hell or High Water" slogan we both reacted immediately. I was thrilled that somewhere a clever marketer was able to turn this into a wonderful battle cry! (See advertising can touch lives!!) Wes just loved the spirit of it. He decided we all needed shirts, the whole family. When we got to the Stampede grounds on one of the busiest days of the event we discovered they were all sold out.

When I got home I ordered some online. This family photo was meant to be our statement of solidarity with our fellow Calgarians! We love this city and its people!

But.. when I downloaded the pictures I realized the Davis' all need haircuts! Except Wes, thanks to the buzz cut I gave him a while ago (sorry again Honey).

Summer fun

This summer, like last summer, we had very few plans. Swimming lessons, VBS and a few scattered appointments. And yet... we have been so busy!!

We enjoyed the Stampede on Sunday, Wes insisted that we go. In fact, I have to admit as we rolled up to the main gates my mind was still full of images of the whole area underwater, I almost cried. Later on as I muscled my way through crowds or waited for 20 minutes for the pleasure of peeing I again almost cried - but for entirely different reasons.

Gavin is starting Field Lacrosse - he is very excited. His first practice was rained out, fingers crossed for tomorrow night.

The kids are almost done their swimming lessons, two more classes - they are loving it!

The kids and I went to a little man made lake today with some neighborhood friends. Again, I have to say how blessed we have been with wonderful neighbors!

Lots of play with local kids and lots of fun.

Nothing of terrible interest to report.

The waters are rising

It is hard to find words to describe the last few days in Calgary.

We live in a place that is cold in the winter, expensive to live in and has a really short, mosquito infested summer. But, there is an upside. We rarely get affected by natural disasters. Occasionally a bad hail storm or a real cold day here and there but nothing significant.

Until this week.

We are dry and safe, but if you were to drive on almost any road just 5 or 8 minutes north of us you would see water - everywhere. The pictures of the downtown look like Venice, a very muddy Venice.

It is quite surreal and more than a little scary.

Our concern at this point is for the people on the front lines of the flood. City employees who are working full speed to keep the rest of the city going. The police, army and other emergency crews who are evacuating and keeping the peace. And of course our many friends who have been evacuated some of whom will come home to great devastation.

I do realize it is all just stuff and yes, you are lucky to all be alive. But loss is still loss. It is still heartbreaking. And to sit by and watch this kind of thing happen and know that no one can do anything to stop it, is beyond frustrating.

So for now we wait, watch and pray.

To quote my kid

Yesterday Mari and I were driving around playing eye spy. Its her new favourite game, but its a bit tricky playing with her, cause she doesn't actually have to see something or give the correct colours. So its a bit of a tricky proposition.

We had been playing for some time when the traffic started to get heavy and I felt I needed to pay a bit more attention to the cars and not looking for wild clues. So I turned up the music and said lets listen to a song. She whined a bit but was alright after a bit.

Later she asked if we could play again and I said yes. I said it was her turn. She informed me that she had her turn but I couldn't hear her. "Mom, I already went, I said," and she starts using a week crying sad little voice, "I spy with my wittle eye, somefing that is sad. And the answer was me."

Father's Day

It is father's day. The day we are to celebrate fathers. We never do much for these sorts of days, mother's day or really any other "special" day. We have a rather low key approach to things.

But...

I thought I'd mark the day with a comment. I love my Dad!! Like every other daughter out there I think my dad is the best. But really, if you look at it empirically, mine is the best. Technically. But, I don't want to start an argument so we'll leave it at that.

And I'm very proud of my husband too. By the time our kids grow up they will be able to say the same thing about there Dad that I say about mine!

I'm thankful to God daily for these men!

Romance

I was never able to give my friends advice on romance and dating. Mostly, because, well... when they were all getting married I still hadn't figured out that not all boys were just like brothers. I was a bit of a late bloomer (or a fat head - not sure which).

This doesn't mean I wasn't an expert in romance, unfortunately I was an expert in 17th century romance, not as useful in today's society.

But now... now... I am an expert. Well, as much of an expert as a horribly pragmatic person who happens to be married to the least romantic man alive can be, but still I think I am now qualified.

I know several young women who are getting married this summer and it has put me into the mood for handing out unwelcome advice. My sage wisdom is obviously not targeted at these young ladies as if they have chosen to get married it is too late for them. But there may be other avid readers of my blog who have been longing to hear my perspective on this issue.

As I said, I am an expert on romance. Not the tawdry Harlequin crappy romance, but the smart clever and funny romances - Jane Austen and... well pretty much just Jane Austen but she rocks!

After over ten years of marriage when I now watch a romantic movie or read a book where the characters fall for one another, I have more opinions than I would have years ago. Here are a couple of my thoughts - an appetizer of sorts.

1. The strong silent type is the most attractive. The problem with this is that they don't talk - no really it isn't that they are just good listeners and will give you all the attention in the world. They don't like to converse, have conversations or in any other way engage with words. Trust me I KNOW! They are still very attractive you just have to be comfortable with talking for two (something that comes pretty naturally to me).

2. You don't need him to give you flowers or gifts to show his affection. The problem with this one is that once they marry you men typically stop doing this sort of thing - so milk it while you can!

3. Most men have hidden depths that only the love of their life will discover. The problem is frankly, most men are WYSIWYG - what you see if what you get. If their depths are hidden they likely aren't there at all. So decide if you like what you see, cause its what you'll end up with.

4. A man that will change for you is a great catch. Frankly if a guy has to change for you then why are you with him. Do him a favour and yourself one too, find someone you can respect enough as he is.


See - all these great gems of advice rolling around in my head and nothing to do with them. Sheesh!

It beats my usual advice that if you want to ensure that you are happy you should find a Wes Davis to marry - it worked for me!

Where did March go?

These week sees another month become a memory. Where does the time go?

Just the other day I was starting to pack lunches and wondering how we would ever get through another year of school. And here we are, it is almost over.

We are like most people, busy. But, perhaps we are a little less busy than others - I don't cope well with a hectic schedule. I like a measured and some what carefree life. If we don't have time to read, watch movies and do generally fun things then what is the point?

We are outside a lot more now and if I can remember to take the camera I'll get some pictures to share.

I am feeling pensive tonight and there are many thoughts I could write about, but I seem to be unable to get a firm grasp on single thoughts so they'll continue to fly around, undisciplined!

This is the weekend...

that the Davis family learns to bike!

Gavin was riding his bike last summer, but was having a hard time starting and stopping. Mainly because I bought a bike that was too big for him (ahem). Last night he tried his bike for the first time this year. I helped him get going and that was it. He is riding like a pro. He's riding as confidently as a kid who has been doing it for three years!! Ataboy!

Bronwyn's little bike was broken so we needed to get her a new one. A neighbor offered one of their old bikes. I was worried because it didn't have training wheels, but she seemed to want it. We brought it home and I helped her for about two minutes in front of our house. When daddy got home she asked if he'd help her. So out they went.

I was inside with Mari, who was still getting suited up. They were out for about 5 minutes. Gavin came in and yelled, "Mom, Bronwyn is riding her bike with Dad just jogging beside her." I grabbed a camera and ran.

She is still having some steering and getting started issues, I think the bike is a bit heavy for her. But once again she has amazed us!! She is so determined and just works so hard. I never thought getting my little girl (heart condition and all) to balance on a bike would be so easy. Specially after the drama of trying to teach Gavin to ride a bike (sorry buddy).

Mari has been flying on her little run bike, her balance is amazing and she has no fear. So she'll be riding in no time, I just don't want to get her a normal bike until Bronwyn has had her turn to get comfortable.

I'm going to need to get myself a bike now so I can keep up. I just need to find a really wide seat for my ample butt!

Change can be a good thing... ?

Saturday will go down in our family annuls as, "not one of Mommy's best days." Before I start, in my defense, I was exceptionally tired. Gavin has been waking up in the night with bad dreams for a while now and Friday night was quite a long night!

Gavin was difficult Saturday morning, which was great since his Dad had to go meet with some clients. So I was left, over tired and negotiating a terribly cranky (and in his defence - sickish) kid.

We made it through that, but I was just not feeling myself. There were kids in and out of the house, mostly out.

Finally Wes came home and we had a quick lunch. I decided to have a bath. I wanted to shave my legs as we were going "out." Our neighbors had insisted that we go out, they gave us a gift card to a near bye restaurant and insisted that they would also babysit. Cause they are great like that!

I turned on the water but before I could undress the neighbors came up to our door to admire Bronwyn's brand new scooter (which she is very proud of by the way). I popped out to chat a bit. When I came in I looked at Wes and my face dropped, "The Bath!" I yelled! Wes just shook his head slowly and said, "I turned it off." Whew - disaster averted.

I usually trim Wes' hair for him. He had borrowed Dad's hair buzzer set (whatever they are called). So we sat down, since the kids were all outside and set him up for a hair cut. I am not a hair dresser, in fact I always laugh that I have only one hair cut in my arsenal. I stick a 1/2 inch guard on the buzzer thing and just trim his hair - short back and sides.

Apparently, as I learned, I have two hair cuts in my arsenal.

I got everything plugged in and fiddled with this and that and then starting at the top of his head I took a long swath of hair. It took about 1/2 a second to realize that I had not put a guard on the buzzer. I was staring at a long bald strip down my husband's head. I gasped!! His hand flew up and he laughed and asked what I was doing.

Well, he took it very well - I however, cried and well...

There was no choice, we couldn't hide it. It would take a Donald Trump type comb over to cover the damage and Wes' hair wasn't that long!

So, Wes now has a VERY short back and sides cut! He looks like he is just home from on weekend leave from the army (well maybe they have more hair than he does). Or, that we were treating him for lice! Either way - it was my fault!

We went on our date and I am glad to say that even with his hair buzzed off my husband is still the sexiest man I know!

This morning Mari said, "Mommy, I miss Daddy's hair. When will it come back?"

Soon Mari, soon... I hope.

A display of the health system at its best

When Bronwyn was born I worried a lot. There is often a lot of news coverage about the failing of our health care system. Long waits, inappropriate treatments and other horrors. I had never needed more than a surface understanding of our medical system, and I certainly had not required more than basic services.

We were amazed at how efficiently and quickly the system worked for us. I have occasionally tried to explain to people how the system is set up, but it was truly a bit confusing to me. I knew it was a large network and there was a base of  collaboration and communication.

I found this video while surfing on You Tube. It helps explain the system very well. Oh and many of our favourite doctors are interviewed, as well as many of our favourite staffers are shown in the video. A nicely put together video that shows just how world class the care our children are receiving.

Its a little long, but it is really worth the watch.

Davis family trip

The Davis family was looonng over due for a family vacation. After a very difficult year we decided that we needed a nice break. We flew to Houston to stay with our close friends Mike and Andrea Reid.

They run the nicest Hotel near Houston. We recommend it highly! They are the most gracious hosts and we enjoyed our stay.

I may try upload a few more picts but here are a couple for now.

Busy world

We've been busy! Really busy! Well... I've been busy.

I found this very sleepy dragon in my house one day!

My lovely husband gave me roses! Isn't he wonderful!

Our little scholar!

Gavin playing chess with his Grandpa!

I have been working from home some. It may not be for too long, I'm just not sure at the moment. I got a call from the company I used to work with, before kids. And they asked if I'd be able to help out for a while.

It has been interesting and well, fairly nice to be back in the old loop again. Many of the people I used to work with are still there - they are "good people."

So far it is working well with life and kids and I'm still able to do Wes' stuff.

It wasn't something I was looking for, but sometimes good things come looking for you!

A Facebook chat

I had a facebook chat with a friend, rather publicly on a link I had posted. In case this friend is reading, there was nothing wrong with the discussion AT ALL, it just caused me to reflect and think.

I think, and maybe I am misinformed, but I am speaking from my experiences over the last several years... As I said, I think that there are some misconceptions about Congenital Heart Defects.

The heart is very mechanical, for lack of a better word. The fixes for many of the congenital heart defects are also pretty mechanical. When people ask about Bronwyn, I laughingly say that the conditioned wasn't fixed but that she's been jerryrigged. I elaborate that the plumbing of her heart has been adjusted. Now this is a gross over simplification, but, people don't understand the complexity of the situation, so I don't bother most times.

The most common misunderstanding is that after her surgeries she has been "fixed." Well, she has in a way, but not in a cure kind of way. There are some CHDs that can be cured by a surgery but many surgery is just part of the on-going treatment.

Many kids have issues with other areas of their heart of other organs all together.

What I have found tough, is that even if you find a child that has the exact same set of conditions as another on paper, the journey they take can be extremely varied. It is the unknown element. The little missing piece that decides whether a child can flourish despite their condition or whether they struggle.

What this is I for one don't know? I do know that if medical people could figure it out they would. They would love to see ever CHD case be a success.

Do I have answers? No.

It is just part of the complexity of these conditions and it bears discussion. Discussion and awareness are always a good thing! Always.

Brag a little

I didn't ask permission to share this news story. But... I think I'll just do it and apologise if I have over-stepped. We are pretty proud of Josh and his teammates!

Oh the drama!

There are certain things you are exposed to as the mother of daughters that you likely never deal with if you only have sons. I am not sure these things are worse or better, but they likely involve more drama.

Today was Bronwyn's dress rehearsal for ballet. Full costume and make-up. Now, if I was a normal mom who got up in the morning and did my face and hair this wouldn't have been such a big deal. But, I don't do my hair, I have a touque for that. And... I have gone from wearing make-up only on Sundays to only wearing it for funerals and weddings. As a result I had to go buy make-up for Bronwyn. I couldn't use six year old mascara on my lovely child (even if I'd use it on myself  - ahem).

I took the list of required items to the store. The red lipstick was a bit of a problem. I mean, what kind of red? So I searched until I found one called - RED. Not passion red, or cherry, or very raspberry bloom. No it was called red! No one could accuse me of getting the wrong colour that way. I picked blush the same way, it was called Light Pink.

So I dropped a substantial amount of money at the drug store on make-up for my girls. Yes, I got a few items for Mari too. If I hadn't there would have been even more drama!

The girls were soooo excited to have make-up. I threatened them to leave it alone and that they were never to touch it, Mommy was the only one who could decide when and how it was to be used.

I gave myself a lot of time to get the girls ready. Mari is in the junior show but she still needs her hair in a bun and the tiniest bit of make-up (just a bit of blush). Hair was the easy part.

Bronwyn was just shaking with excitement and kept asking if she could get the make-up. I said no, took a deep breath, retrieved the bags of contraband and sat down to collect my thoughts.

I had her sit on the coffee table in front of me and I very carefully started to apply a bit of foundation (as the instructions required). Then a light dusting of powder. So far, so good. In fact, this was a bit fun. Then Bronwyn said, "OK, Mom are we done now?"

The bubble burst as I said, "No honey, we have just got started."

Next, the eyes. Eye shadow not so hard. Eye liner trickier. Had to redo some of the eyeshadow to help cover the mistakes made on the little fidgety eye lids. "Not that again." Sighed Bronwyn. We were apparently never going to be done.

So, now the thing I had been dreading all day. Mascara! A light hand, careful so careful. Almost there. Oooohh, not bad if I do say so. I put the sticky thing down and Bronwyn unused to the feeling lifted her hand and rubbed her eye! I yelled, "No, don't touch your eyes." She started and started to cry. Now I yelled, "No, don't cry." She shut her eye and smeared the now wet makeup all over.

It was at this point that Wes walked into the house.

This is what he overheard, "No crying, stop. If you don't stop I'm going to pull you out of ballet and put you in soccer. There is no makeup in soccer!" Finally, after a few deep breaths we both calmed down, we washed up the offending black smudges and started with touch ups.

I pulled out the eye shadow and she said, "Not that again."

Finally, it was Mari's turn...

Winter fun

I downloaded some photos from my big camera and was shocked by how many photos I have actually taken lately. Here are some winter fun shots. Gavin has been enjoying playing street hockey with his dad. Mari likes to chase the ball - she's part golden retreiver.

Wes & I took Bronwyn and Mari skating today while Gavin was playing at the neighbors. Mari has really never been on skates before so this was her first shot at it. Bronwyn hasn't been on skates since last year. I was seriously proud of both of them. They did great!

 

 

 

Recent conversation

I had this conversation with Mari just before Christmas.

Me - Mari, lets go into this store so we can get Robbie his Christmas present.
Mari - I know what we should get Robbie.
Me - What?
Mari - Flowers.
Me - I dunno honey. I'm not sure Robbie would be thrilled to get flowers for Christmas.
Mari - He would.
Me - No. Mari, sorry but we are not getting him flowers.
Mari - Mommy?
Me - Yes.
Mari - Why do I have such an old Mom?
Me - Well, I guess I'm just the age I am. You are stuck with me.
Mari - Mommy? Why do I have such a mean old mom?
Me - Mari? Why do I have such a mean daughter?
Mari - I'm not mean, you mean.
Me - (to myself) I am not having this argument with a four year old! (to Mari) OK, come with me, lets go shopping.

I thought I'd wait at least until the early teens for these kind of conversations. Oh well.

Just thought it was kind of a fun story.

Last post of 2012

2012 has been an interesting year for our family. To be honest, it is not a year I would willing live through again. It was stressful both personally and financially. But am I sorry we lived through it? No.

As I have said after many other struggles in our life, while I would love to undo the painful parts I likely wouldn't as they are what shapes us and makes us who we are.

The "house" dominated our lives last year. Wes was absent most of the year and all of our efforts were poured into that one endeavour. It was very hard on many fronts. I always suspected my husband could do wonderful things with a home if given a chance. The reward I have gained from this last year is confidence in Wes. Now I don't suspect he is good at this, I know he is. And I am very proud of him. I am proud of myself for managing our rather tricky family finances throughout that time. I am proud of my parents for their unfailing love and support. They really truly are exceptional people.

Sorry this is sounding like an award speech.

I guess this year proved that we still have much to learn as a family and as individuals. Did we do everything right this year? No. But we continue to learn and journey. The trick in life is not to think you are ever getting to a point where you have arrived or reached the height of wisdom. Cause as soon as you hit that spot you look up and see another mountain.

I am thankful. We have been richly richly blessed. Our family is healthy and intact. We have lived yet another year with each other, growing and learning.

I was telling Wes this morning that I am thankful God has placed him in my life. Life can be a troubled road and I have been blessed with a wonderful traveling companion. This is truly a blessing.

So, what does 2013 hold for us? No idea.

But bring it on, cause God is with us and he is steadfast and he will sustain.

Annual Christmas card

I have once again failed to send Christmas cards. So here is our virtual card. The photo session was rather painful as several of our children (all but Bronwyn) were not interested in being cooperative. At least we are all together!

We would again love to hear from you - so if you can leave us a greeting in the comments, even if you don't know us. Its a global village and we'd love to hear from you.

God bless you all this Christmas season. May you have peaceful, joyful and safe holiday.

Long weekend, sort of

Wes is taking tomorrow off. We haven't had a long weekend as a family in a very long time. So I am excited. Mari has school and we have to go for parent teacher interviews for the older two. But by 11:30 all that will be done and it will be all party for the Davis family.

I will make it my mission to take photos this weekend.

I am frantically trying to get caught up and organized for Christmas. I am normally way ahead  of the game. I think by this point last year I had all my presents and they were all wrapped and most that needed shipping were already shipped. This year... not so much.

I'm blaming the house project, although that excuse will only last so long.

We are having a quiet at home night tonight - just what the doctor ordered!

Christmas Excess

This is the time of year the conversation with the other parents at the school yard turns to Christmas and the preparations for Christmas.

The first hurdle is usually trying to explain what I have against Christmas trees. Its not that I don't like them. I just have a very small house and there is already 5 people crammed into it. Can you blame me for not wanting to introduce a massive blinking flashing tree in the middle for us all the navigate around. We will do it, just not in November!

The subject of gift giving always brings up interesting questions. Do our kids need all this stuff? It feels so excessive? Do you struggle with the materialism and glut at Christmas? These are the kinds of thoughts and questions that I hear coming from the other parents and have thought myself.

Last year while discussing this with one of my good mommy friends it dawned on me. I think our kids do need to receive presents at Christmas. I think it is a good thing. I remember the joy of getting gifts at Christmas, the excitement, surprise and happiness. That experience has enriched my experience as an adult. My joy at giving to my kids far exceeds their joy. I can hardly sleep the night before Christmas! As a child I had no idea that my parents likely felt exactly the same way.

Now, you must realize that we still do Christmas very modestly. We are not big spoilers! I don't believe in foolishly spending money, particularly if one doesn't have it. But, the cost and size of the gift doesn't matter - trust me on this one.

Our kids have started the process of maturity. It starts with learning to enjoy receiving gifts. To truly understand this pleasure will give them greater appreciation when they give gifts. They will grow to be givers who know the pleasure they are giving.

I sometimes caution myself not to expect my kids to be more mature than what they are. I can't expect them to embrace the idea of giving at an adult level. Nor can I expect them to know that excess is harmful to them. I just have to control those areas and help them enjoy what they do receive.

So, although I may have well published issues with Santa Clause and Christmas Trees I do not have issues with gift giving and receiving.

Maybe it is the very thing to help us focus on what was given to us. The best gift ever. One we could never aspire to give but can only be grateful to receive. Grace.

Amazing news

I borrowed this link from a heart group I belong to on Facebook.

I was absolutely amazed. This to me seems the stuff of science fiction. I am beyond thrilled that they are able to explore this and I wish them great success. Wouldn't it be wonderful for future parents of children with HLHS or single ventrical syndrom to be able to say their child was cured!

Wow!

A right of passage

When I think back to my childhood it seems that Halloween was usually snowy. If not snowy, at least very cold. Maybe it wasn't every year but I don't really remember any warm trick or treat outtings.

So now, my kids finally had the opportunity to go out for the neighborhood candy-fest in the snow. Good memories for them too. This year, against our usual custom, I went out with the kids and followed them around. It was good fun.

Mari stood and chatted at almost every door. She stopped and waved and chatted to almost every other person we met as we strolled. It was a great opportunity to meet people, according to Mari. What a girl!

On another front, the new owners took possession of the Wildwood house today, so now we no longer own two homes. I have said it before and I'll say it again, I am very proud of what my husband accomplished.

A song to share

Today is Gavin's birthday and Halloween. And I am thrilled to get to celebrate these lovely childhood milestones with my family. What a blessing. We will have a party for Gavin on the weekend.

I have been listening to Shine FM more lately. Mostly because I have discovered that my children are starting to comprehend some of the lyrics to songs that I'm not sure are appropriate. Thanks to the M&Ms commercial Mari runs around shaking her wee bum and yelling, I'm sexy and I know it. But she says it so fast it sort of sounds like - I'msixtyandwoit.

I heard this song on the radio and it really touched me. I have been through a bit of a struggle lately. Don't get me wrong I wouldn't equate it with the more serious struggles in life, no one was ill, no one died, but it was a struggle that hit me in a spot of great weakness. I am sorry to say I didn't always rise above it, nor did I always handle it well. And although I may be a disappointment to myself I also now wonder if maybe that is the point. Maybe we shouldn't always be above our struggles. Maybe it should be hard sometimes. Maybe this is how we grow and learn.

So I'm not perfect. Whew. Glad I got that out of the way, cause I'm not sure I was fooling anyone anyhow. And I'm pretty darn sure God doesn't expect me to be perfect, after all that is why he sent Jesus.

Absentee

Wow! I have not been writing on my blog lately. It is unpardonable but not without excuse.

1. We have been very busy.
2. I have been having a nervous breakdown.
3. I haven't been particularly keen to share the details of my nervous breakdown.
4. I appear to be very good at nervous breakdowns.
5. OK, I think that is about it...

The big house project we undertook is almost over!! It is conditionally sold and the conditions will be removed by Tuesday if all goes well. Then the possession date is early November.

I am very proud of my husband and what he has done. So on to the next chapter of our lives. Praying it will be a peaceful one! YIKES!

God bless you all and thanks to all of you who have remembered us in prayer it means so much to us. More than you can know.