The waters are rising

It is hard to find words to describe the last few days in Calgary.

We live in a place that is cold in the winter, expensive to live in and has a really short, mosquito infested summer. But, there is an upside. We rarely get affected by natural disasters. Occasionally a bad hail storm or a real cold day here and there but nothing significant.

Until this week.

We are dry and safe, but if you were to drive on almost any road just 5 or 8 minutes north of us you would see water - everywhere. The pictures of the downtown look like Venice, a very muddy Venice.

It is quite surreal and more than a little scary.

Our concern at this point is for the people on the front lines of the flood. City employees who are working full speed to keep the rest of the city going. The police, army and other emergency crews who are evacuating and keeping the peace. And of course our many friends who have been evacuated some of whom will come home to great devastation.

I do realize it is all just stuff and yes, you are lucky to all be alive. But loss is still loss. It is still heartbreaking. And to sit by and watch this kind of thing happen and know that no one can do anything to stop it, is beyond frustrating.

So for now we wait, watch and pray.

To quote my kid

Yesterday Mari and I were driving around playing eye spy. Its her new favourite game, but its a bit tricky playing with her, cause she doesn't actually have to see something or give the correct colours. So its a bit of a tricky proposition.

We had been playing for some time when the traffic started to get heavy and I felt I needed to pay a bit more attention to the cars and not looking for wild clues. So I turned up the music and said lets listen to a song. She whined a bit but was alright after a bit.

Later she asked if we could play again and I said yes. I said it was her turn. She informed me that she had her turn but I couldn't hear her. "Mom, I already went, I said," and she starts using a week crying sad little voice, "I spy with my wittle eye, somefing that is sad. And the answer was me."

Father's Day

It is father's day. The day we are to celebrate fathers. We never do much for these sorts of days, mother's day or really any other "special" day. We have a rather low key approach to things.

But...

I thought I'd mark the day with a comment. I love my Dad!! Like every other daughter out there I think my dad is the best. But really, if you look at it empirically, mine is the best. Technically. But, I don't want to start an argument so we'll leave it at that.

And I'm very proud of my husband too. By the time our kids grow up they will be able to say the same thing about there Dad that I say about mine!

I'm thankful to God daily for these men!

Romance

I was never able to give my friends advice on romance and dating. Mostly, because, well... when they were all getting married I still hadn't figured out that not all boys were just like brothers. I was a bit of a late bloomer (or a fat head - not sure which).

This doesn't mean I wasn't an expert in romance, unfortunately I was an expert in 17th century romance, not as useful in today's society.

But now... now... I am an expert. Well, as much of an expert as a horribly pragmatic person who happens to be married to the least romantic man alive can be, but still I think I am now qualified.

I know several young women who are getting married this summer and it has put me into the mood for handing out unwelcome advice. My sage wisdom is obviously not targeted at these young ladies as if they have chosen to get married it is too late for them. But there may be other avid readers of my blog who have been longing to hear my perspective on this issue.

As I said, I am an expert on romance. Not the tawdry Harlequin crappy romance, but the smart clever and funny romances - Jane Austen and... well pretty much just Jane Austen but she rocks!

After over ten years of marriage when I now watch a romantic movie or read a book where the characters fall for one another, I have more opinions than I would have years ago. Here are a couple of my thoughts - an appetizer of sorts.

1. The strong silent type is the most attractive. The problem with this is that they don't talk - no really it isn't that they are just good listeners and will give you all the attention in the world. They don't like to converse, have conversations or in any other way engage with words. Trust me I KNOW! They are still very attractive you just have to be comfortable with talking for two (something that comes pretty naturally to me).

2. You don't need him to give you flowers or gifts to show his affection. The problem with this one is that once they marry you men typically stop doing this sort of thing - so milk it while you can!

3. Most men have hidden depths that only the love of their life will discover. The problem is frankly, most men are WYSIWYG - what you see if what you get. If their depths are hidden they likely aren't there at all. So decide if you like what you see, cause its what you'll end up with.

4. A man that will change for you is a great catch. Frankly if a guy has to change for you then why are you with him. Do him a favour and yourself one too, find someone you can respect enough as he is.


See - all these great gems of advice rolling around in my head and nothing to do with them. Sheesh!

It beats my usual advice that if you want to ensure that you are happy you should find a Wes Davis to marry - it worked for me!

Where did March go?

These week sees another month become a memory. Where does the time go?

Just the other day I was starting to pack lunches and wondering how we would ever get through another year of school. And here we are, it is almost over.

We are like most people, busy. But, perhaps we are a little less busy than others - I don't cope well with a hectic schedule. I like a measured and some what carefree life. If we don't have time to read, watch movies and do generally fun things then what is the point?

We are outside a lot more now and if I can remember to take the camera I'll get some pictures to share.

I am feeling pensive tonight and there are many thoughts I could write about, but I seem to be unable to get a firm grasp on single thoughts so they'll continue to fly around, undisciplined!

This is the weekend...

that the Davis family learns to bike!

Gavin was riding his bike last summer, but was having a hard time starting and stopping. Mainly because I bought a bike that was too big for him (ahem). Last night he tried his bike for the first time this year. I helped him get going and that was it. He is riding like a pro. He's riding as confidently as a kid who has been doing it for three years!! Ataboy!

Bronwyn's little bike was broken so we needed to get her a new one. A neighbor offered one of their old bikes. I was worried because it didn't have training wheels, but she seemed to want it. We brought it home and I helped her for about two minutes in front of our house. When daddy got home she asked if he'd help her. So out they went.

I was inside with Mari, who was still getting suited up. They were out for about 5 minutes. Gavin came in and yelled, "Mom, Bronwyn is riding her bike with Dad just jogging beside her." I grabbed a camera and ran.

She is still having some steering and getting started issues, I think the bike is a bit heavy for her. But once again she has amazed us!! She is so determined and just works so hard. I never thought getting my little girl (heart condition and all) to balance on a bike would be so easy. Specially after the drama of trying to teach Gavin to ride a bike (sorry buddy).

Mari has been flying on her little run bike, her balance is amazing and she has no fear. So she'll be riding in no time, I just don't want to get her a normal bike until Bronwyn has had her turn to get comfortable.

I'm going to need to get myself a bike now so I can keep up. I just need to find a really wide seat for my ample butt!

Change can be a good thing... ?

Saturday will go down in our family annuls as, "not one of Mommy's best days." Before I start, in my defense, I was exceptionally tired. Gavin has been waking up in the night with bad dreams for a while now and Friday night was quite a long night!

Gavin was difficult Saturday morning, which was great since his Dad had to go meet with some clients. So I was left, over tired and negotiating a terribly cranky (and in his defence - sickish) kid.

We made it through that, but I was just not feeling myself. There were kids in and out of the house, mostly out.

Finally Wes came home and we had a quick lunch. I decided to have a bath. I wanted to shave my legs as we were going "out." Our neighbors had insisted that we go out, they gave us a gift card to a near bye restaurant and insisted that they would also babysit. Cause they are great like that!

I turned on the water but before I could undress the neighbors came up to our door to admire Bronwyn's brand new scooter (which she is very proud of by the way). I popped out to chat a bit. When I came in I looked at Wes and my face dropped, "The Bath!" I yelled! Wes just shook his head slowly and said, "I turned it off." Whew - disaster averted.

I usually trim Wes' hair for him. He had borrowed Dad's hair buzzer set (whatever they are called). So we sat down, since the kids were all outside and set him up for a hair cut. I am not a hair dresser, in fact I always laugh that I have only one hair cut in my arsenal. I stick a 1/2 inch guard on the buzzer thing and just trim his hair - short back and sides.

Apparently, as I learned, I have two hair cuts in my arsenal.

I got everything plugged in and fiddled with this and that and then starting at the top of his head I took a long swath of hair. It took about 1/2 a second to realize that I had not put a guard on the buzzer. I was staring at a long bald strip down my husband's head. I gasped!! His hand flew up and he laughed and asked what I was doing.

Well, he took it very well - I however, cried and well...

There was no choice, we couldn't hide it. It would take a Donald Trump type comb over to cover the damage and Wes' hair wasn't that long!

So, Wes now has a VERY short back and sides cut! He looks like he is just home from on weekend leave from the army (well maybe they have more hair than he does). Or, that we were treating him for lice! Either way - it was my fault!

We went on our date and I am glad to say that even with his hair buzzed off my husband is still the sexiest man I know!

This morning Mari said, "Mommy, I miss Daddy's hair. When will it come back?"

Soon Mari, soon... I hope.

A display of the health system at its best

When Bronwyn was born I worried a lot. There is often a lot of news coverage about the failing of our health care system. Long waits, inappropriate treatments and other horrors. I had never needed more than a surface understanding of our medical system, and I certainly had not required more than basic services.

We were amazed at how efficiently and quickly the system worked for us. I have occasionally tried to explain to people how the system is set up, but it was truly a bit confusing to me. I knew it was a large network and there was a base of  collaboration and communication.

I found this video while surfing on You Tube. It helps explain the system very well. Oh and many of our favourite doctors are interviewed, as well as many of our favourite staffers are shown in the video. A nicely put together video that shows just how world class the care our children are receiving.

Its a little long, but it is really worth the watch.

Davis family trip

The Davis family was looonng over due for a family vacation. After a very difficult year we decided that we needed a nice break. We flew to Houston to stay with our close friends Mike and Andrea Reid.

They run the nicest Hotel near Houston. We recommend it highly! They are the most gracious hosts and we enjoyed our stay.

I may try upload a few more picts but here are a couple for now.

Busy world

We've been busy! Really busy! Well... I've been busy.

I found this very sleepy dragon in my house one day!

My lovely husband gave me roses! Isn't he wonderful!

Our little scholar!

Gavin playing chess with his Grandpa!

I have been working from home some. It may not be for too long, I'm just not sure at the moment. I got a call from the company I used to work with, before kids. And they asked if I'd be able to help out for a while.

It has been interesting and well, fairly nice to be back in the old loop again. Many of the people I used to work with are still there - they are "good people."

So far it is working well with life and kids and I'm still able to do Wes' stuff.

It wasn't something I was looking for, but sometimes good things come looking for you!

A Facebook chat

I had a facebook chat with a friend, rather publicly on a link I had posted. In case this friend is reading, there was nothing wrong with the discussion AT ALL, it just caused me to reflect and think.

I think, and maybe I am misinformed, but I am speaking from my experiences over the last several years... As I said, I think that there are some misconceptions about Congenital Heart Defects.

The heart is very mechanical, for lack of a better word. The fixes for many of the congenital heart defects are also pretty mechanical. When people ask about Bronwyn, I laughingly say that the conditioned wasn't fixed but that she's been jerryrigged. I elaborate that the plumbing of her heart has been adjusted. Now this is a gross over simplification, but, people don't understand the complexity of the situation, so I don't bother most times.

The most common misunderstanding is that after her surgeries she has been "fixed." Well, she has in a way, but not in a cure kind of way. There are some CHDs that can be cured by a surgery but many surgery is just part of the on-going treatment.

Many kids have issues with other areas of their heart of other organs all together.

What I have found tough, is that even if you find a child that has the exact same set of conditions as another on paper, the journey they take can be extremely varied. It is the unknown element. The little missing piece that decides whether a child can flourish despite their condition or whether they struggle.

What this is I for one don't know? I do know that if medical people could figure it out they would. They would love to see ever CHD case be a success.

Do I have answers? No.

It is just part of the complexity of these conditions and it bears discussion. Discussion and awareness are always a good thing! Always.

Brag a little

I didn't ask permission to share this news story. But... I think I'll just do it and apologise if I have over-stepped. We are pretty proud of Josh and his teammates!

Oh the drama!

There are certain things you are exposed to as the mother of daughters that you likely never deal with if you only have sons. I am not sure these things are worse or better, but they likely involve more drama.

Today was Bronwyn's dress rehearsal for ballet. Full costume and make-up. Now, if I was a normal mom who got up in the morning and did my face and hair this wouldn't have been such a big deal. But, I don't do my hair, I have a touque for that. And... I have gone from wearing make-up only on Sundays to only wearing it for funerals and weddings. As a result I had to go buy make-up for Bronwyn. I couldn't use six year old mascara on my lovely child (even if I'd use it on myself  - ahem).

I took the list of required items to the store. The red lipstick was a bit of a problem. I mean, what kind of red? So I searched until I found one called - RED. Not passion red, or cherry, or very raspberry bloom. No it was called red! No one could accuse me of getting the wrong colour that way. I picked blush the same way, it was called Light Pink.

So I dropped a substantial amount of money at the drug store on make-up for my girls. Yes, I got a few items for Mari too. If I hadn't there would have been even more drama!

The girls were soooo excited to have make-up. I threatened them to leave it alone and that they were never to touch it, Mommy was the only one who could decide when and how it was to be used.

I gave myself a lot of time to get the girls ready. Mari is in the junior show but she still needs her hair in a bun and the tiniest bit of make-up (just a bit of blush). Hair was the easy part.

Bronwyn was just shaking with excitement and kept asking if she could get the make-up. I said no, took a deep breath, retrieved the bags of contraband and sat down to collect my thoughts.

I had her sit on the coffee table in front of me and I very carefully started to apply a bit of foundation (as the instructions required). Then a light dusting of powder. So far, so good. In fact, this was a bit fun. Then Bronwyn said, "OK, Mom are we done now?"

The bubble burst as I said, "No honey, we have just got started."

Next, the eyes. Eye shadow not so hard. Eye liner trickier. Had to redo some of the eyeshadow to help cover the mistakes made on the little fidgety eye lids. "Not that again." Sighed Bronwyn. We were apparently never going to be done.

So, now the thing I had been dreading all day. Mascara! A light hand, careful so careful. Almost there. Oooohh, not bad if I do say so. I put the sticky thing down and Bronwyn unused to the feeling lifted her hand and rubbed her eye! I yelled, "No, don't touch your eyes." She started and started to cry. Now I yelled, "No, don't cry." She shut her eye and smeared the now wet makeup all over.

It was at this point that Wes walked into the house.

This is what he overheard, "No crying, stop. If you don't stop I'm going to pull you out of ballet and put you in soccer. There is no makeup in soccer!" Finally, after a few deep breaths we both calmed down, we washed up the offending black smudges and started with touch ups.

I pulled out the eye shadow and she said, "Not that again."

Finally, it was Mari's turn...

Winter fun

I downloaded some photos from my big camera and was shocked by how many photos I have actually taken lately. Here are some winter fun shots. Gavin has been enjoying playing street hockey with his dad. Mari likes to chase the ball - she's part golden retreiver.

Wes & I took Bronwyn and Mari skating today while Gavin was playing at the neighbors. Mari has really never been on skates before so this was her first shot at it. Bronwyn hasn't been on skates since last year. I was seriously proud of both of them. They did great!

 

 

 

Recent conversation

I had this conversation with Mari just before Christmas.

Me - Mari, lets go into this store so we can get Robbie his Christmas present.
Mari - I know what we should get Robbie.
Me - What?
Mari - Flowers.
Me - I dunno honey. I'm not sure Robbie would be thrilled to get flowers for Christmas.
Mari - He would.
Me - No. Mari, sorry but we are not getting him flowers.
Mari - Mommy?
Me - Yes.
Mari - Why do I have such an old Mom?
Me - Well, I guess I'm just the age I am. You are stuck with me.
Mari - Mommy? Why do I have such a mean old mom?
Me - Mari? Why do I have such a mean daughter?
Mari - I'm not mean, you mean.
Me - (to myself) I am not having this argument with a four year old! (to Mari) OK, come with me, lets go shopping.

I thought I'd wait at least until the early teens for these kind of conversations. Oh well.

Just thought it was kind of a fun story.

Last post of 2012

2012 has been an interesting year for our family. To be honest, it is not a year I would willing live through again. It was stressful both personally and financially. But am I sorry we lived through it? No.

As I have said after many other struggles in our life, while I would love to undo the painful parts I likely wouldn't as they are what shapes us and makes us who we are.

The "house" dominated our lives last year. Wes was absent most of the year and all of our efforts were poured into that one endeavour. It was very hard on many fronts. I always suspected my husband could do wonderful things with a home if given a chance. The reward I have gained from this last year is confidence in Wes. Now I don't suspect he is good at this, I know he is. And I am very proud of him. I am proud of myself for managing our rather tricky family finances throughout that time. I am proud of my parents for their unfailing love and support. They really truly are exceptional people.

Sorry this is sounding like an award speech.

I guess this year proved that we still have much to learn as a family and as individuals. Did we do everything right this year? No. But we continue to learn and journey. The trick in life is not to think you are ever getting to a point where you have arrived or reached the height of wisdom. Cause as soon as you hit that spot you look up and see another mountain.

I am thankful. We have been richly richly blessed. Our family is healthy and intact. We have lived yet another year with each other, growing and learning.

I was telling Wes this morning that I am thankful God has placed him in my life. Life can be a troubled road and I have been blessed with a wonderful traveling companion. This is truly a blessing.

So, what does 2013 hold for us? No idea.

But bring it on, cause God is with us and he is steadfast and he will sustain.

Annual Christmas card

I have once again failed to send Christmas cards. So here is our virtual card. The photo session was rather painful as several of our children (all but Bronwyn) were not interested in being cooperative. At least we are all together!

We would again love to hear from you - so if you can leave us a greeting in the comments, even if you don't know us. Its a global village and we'd love to hear from you.

God bless you all this Christmas season. May you have peaceful, joyful and safe holiday.

Long weekend, sort of

Wes is taking tomorrow off. We haven't had a long weekend as a family in a very long time. So I am excited. Mari has school and we have to go for parent teacher interviews for the older two. But by 11:30 all that will be done and it will be all party for the Davis family.

I will make it my mission to take photos this weekend.

I am frantically trying to get caught up and organized for Christmas. I am normally way ahead  of the game. I think by this point last year I had all my presents and they were all wrapped and most that needed shipping were already shipped. This year... not so much.

I'm blaming the house project, although that excuse will only last so long.

We are having a quiet at home night tonight - just what the doctor ordered!

Christmas Excess

This is the time of year the conversation with the other parents at the school yard turns to Christmas and the preparations for Christmas.

The first hurdle is usually trying to explain what I have against Christmas trees. Its not that I don't like them. I just have a very small house and there is already 5 people crammed into it. Can you blame me for not wanting to introduce a massive blinking flashing tree in the middle for us all the navigate around. We will do it, just not in November!

The subject of gift giving always brings up interesting questions. Do our kids need all this stuff? It feels so excessive? Do you struggle with the materialism and glut at Christmas? These are the kinds of thoughts and questions that I hear coming from the other parents and have thought myself.

Last year while discussing this with one of my good mommy friends it dawned on me. I think our kids do need to receive presents at Christmas. I think it is a good thing. I remember the joy of getting gifts at Christmas, the excitement, surprise and happiness. That experience has enriched my experience as an adult. My joy at giving to my kids far exceeds their joy. I can hardly sleep the night before Christmas! As a child I had no idea that my parents likely felt exactly the same way.

Now, you must realize that we still do Christmas very modestly. We are not big spoilers! I don't believe in foolishly spending money, particularly if one doesn't have it. But, the cost and size of the gift doesn't matter - trust me on this one.

Our kids have started the process of maturity. It starts with learning to enjoy receiving gifts. To truly understand this pleasure will give them greater appreciation when they give gifts. They will grow to be givers who know the pleasure they are giving.

I sometimes caution myself not to expect my kids to be more mature than what they are. I can't expect them to embrace the idea of giving at an adult level. Nor can I expect them to know that excess is harmful to them. I just have to control those areas and help them enjoy what they do receive.

So, although I may have well published issues with Santa Clause and Christmas Trees I do not have issues with gift giving and receiving.

Maybe it is the very thing to help us focus on what was given to us. The best gift ever. One we could never aspire to give but can only be grateful to receive. Grace.

Amazing news

I borrowed this link from a heart group I belong to on Facebook.

I was absolutely amazed. This to me seems the stuff of science fiction. I am beyond thrilled that they are able to explore this and I wish them great success. Wouldn't it be wonderful for future parents of children with HLHS or single ventrical syndrom to be able to say their child was cured!

Wow!